Yassin

You're getting funnier

We tried to sign Lafferty before Van Veen, and I think Alexander played alongside him at Burnley, so I don't think there's anything to suggest we wouldn't go for him on that basis. I don't think he's what we need right now though. As well as Van Veen and Watt have performed thus far I think they've been a bit of an awkward fit in our system, with one having to play out left. If we're replacing Watt I'd rather see a James Scott type (not James Scott I know he's at Hibs until the end of the season) wide forward.

I think I'm usually pretty good at parsing OtF's obliquity but I'm struggling with this one. Watt doesn't want to leave in January so we're apparently taking a small fee from United then using it to pay off his contract?

Vigz was a baller

I'm not usually a fan of claret and amber other than Motherwell- too uncanny valley maybe?- but that's lovely.

I liked the part of the institutional pro-Rangers corruption where they were voted out of the top flight, into the Third Division and Celtic won a quadruple treble.

I've been to every SPFL ground in Lanarkshire, except Cliftonhill and the Excelsior.

I missed all Scotland's Euros games because I was too busy watching Zaine Francis Angol's Hartlepool friendlies

Fucking hell man, fair enough not watching Scotland games but spending international breaks following Craig Clay around the country? Jesus.

To go back to the weird hypothetical stuff, European Group Stages would be surreal and a great atmosphere around the club but I can't imagine it being better than the (I assume) unbridled joy of winning a trophy.

I wasn't at the game yesterday but if I was I'd probably have gave Turnbull a polite clap when he was warming up then basically ignored him the rest of the game. When it comes to a guy that's by all accounts a genuine Motherwell fan, who pretty much singlehandedly made the 18/19 season worth watching, went out of his way to ensure the club got our record transfer fee for him when he could have run his contract down twice,has never publicly badmouthed the club in a situation where lots of other footballers would have and - let's be honest- will most likely be back at Fir Park in ten years once he's made his millions and lost the rest of his pace- I really don't think it's worth getting worked up about.

I'm pretty ambivalent on Sturgeon (I voted Green) but if all Steelboy did is call her Jimmy Krankie I'm a bit mystified by the reaction here. It's shite patter but hardly the worst thing that you could say about the country's most senior politician.

Every other Premiership CEO, frantically refreshing Alan Burrow's Twitter, "haud the bus, Motherwell are hoping to sign at least one before deadline day!"

"We exist to improve people's lives. Relentlessly"

I don't really watch much football outside Scotland anymore but how on earth have you not heard of Diego Costa or David Luiz?

Hopefully the devil makes six fairly often!

This Monkey's Gone To Kevin

They offered far more going forward away to a seeded team in Europe than I can remember us doing in at least a decade.

I'm not saying I could recite the entire lyrics to Come On Eileen at the drop of a hat but I think enough people know the general tune and basic lyrical premise to bullshit something coherent sounding.

I'm usually apprehensive about Saints games, even when they've had far less impressive squads than this. I'm not this time for some reason, 0-2.

Jolene?

Captaincy always seems like a really weird thing to get worked up about to me. Unless you're ITK or whatever about the internal dynamics and relationships at the club it's an entirely pointless discussion.

Too wee

Is this contingent on the season being called two months early due to another global pandemic, literally hours before we were due to play the team immediately below us?

Some mate you are.