Yassin

I usually think you lean towards pessimism but are at least grounded in reality but I don't really see where you're coming from with this. KVV is as mercurial a forward as we've had in years, Woolery and Shields both have pace to burn, Roberts is good for a spectacular goal now and then and Slattery and Goss are both very technically capable in midfield. Even the likes of Mugabi rampaging up and down the flank has been a laugh this season, and there's no reason Tierney, Shaw and Efford couldn't all be exciting players for us. You might think all of the above are inconsistent/pish- and I'd agree with you on a few- but it's far from the most workmanlike squad we've had in recent seasons. There was a while were our striking options were Main, Bowman, Sammon and Johnson, and our "flair" players were Elliot Frear and Gael Bigirimana.

I tried but lost count after the first 5 minutes

Would hope Slattery and possibly Shaw rectify that

Not signing a striker would be incredibly weird given how achievable Europe is and how big it could be for us.

Beat Stirling last night

I think Taylor would have been good for us. Decent at heading the ball away when not required to do any passing. Academic though as Sol, Mugabi, Lamie and Ojala have all been outstanding this season.

I see Sturgeon has listened to Steelboy's internet randoms instead of Mark Drakeford.

With the Edinburgh teams, Aberdeen and United ramping up financially by the looks of things, this might be our best chance to finish Top 4 for a few seasons. To those ends, I don't really have a problem with us bringing in some short term quality, regardless of the source.

If the rumours are true and we'll have full houses again from the 17th, will you be accusing Sturgeon of talking shite or failing to engage her brain?

You're getting funnier

We tried to sign Lafferty before Van Veen, and I think Alexander played alongside him at Burnley, so I don't think there's anything to suggest we wouldn't go for him on that basis. I don't think he's what we need right now though. As well as Van Veen and Watt have performed thus far I think they've been a bit of an awkward fit in our system, with one having to play out left. If we're replacing Watt I'd rather see a James Scott type (not James Scott I know he's at Hibs until the end of the season) wide forward.

I think I'm usually pretty good at parsing OtF's obliquity but I'm struggling with this one. Watt doesn't want to leave in January so we're apparently taking a small fee from United then using it to pay off his contract?

Vigz was a baller

I'm not usually a fan of claret and amber other than Motherwell- too uncanny valley maybe?- but that's lovely.

I liked the part of the institutional pro-Rangers corruption where they were voted out of the top flight, into the Third Division and Celtic won a quadruple treble.

I've been to every SPFL ground in Lanarkshire, except Cliftonhill and the Excelsior.

I missed all Scotland's Euros games because I was too busy watching Zaine Francis Angol's Hartlepool friendlies

Fucking hell man, fair enough not watching Scotland games but spending international breaks following Craig Clay around the country? Jesus.

To go back to the weird hypothetical stuff, European Group Stages would be surreal and a great atmosphere around the club but I can't imagine it being better than the (I assume) unbridled joy of winning a trophy.

I wasn't at the game yesterday but if I was I'd probably have gave Turnbull a polite clap when he was warming up then basically ignored him the rest of the game. When it comes to a guy that's by all accounts a genuine Motherwell fan, who pretty much singlehandedly made the 18/19 season worth watching, went out of his way to ensure the club got our record transfer fee for him when he could have run his contract down twice,has never publicly badmouthed the club in a situation where lots of other footballers would have and - let's be honest- will most likely be back at Fir Park in ten years once he's made his millions and lost the rest of his pace- I really don't think it's worth getting worked up about.

I'm pretty ambivalent on Sturgeon (I voted Green) but if all Steelboy did is call her Jimmy Krankie I'm a bit mystified by the reaction here. It's shite patter but hardly the worst thing that you could say about the country's most senior politician.

Every other Premiership CEO, frantically refreshing Alan Burrow's Twitter, "haud the bus, Motherwell are hoping to sign at least one before deadline day!"

"We exist to improve people's lives. Relentlessly"

I don't really watch much football outside Scotland anymore but how on earth have you not heard of Diego Costa or David Luiz?

Hopefully the devil makes six fairly often!